Sadism and Masochism in a D/s Relationship LB061

Kayla Lords and John Brownstone discuss sadism and masochism in a D/s relationship in episode 61 of the Loving BDSM podcast. In this episode: John Brownstone is having a sale on his (very vanilla) Etsy shop - The Wood Dom! S & M is separate from D/s - you can be one, but not the other. Not every kinkster is into pain. One of you can be into it and not the other and still make it work A non-masochist sub may consider it part of their submission, another way to make a Dominant happy; a non-sadist may try it out to make a submissive happy or fill a need You can “outsource” S&M if one of you is into it and the other isn’t - find someone you like and trust who can top or bottom for you to fulfill that need, a play partner Common myths: Only one type of S&M play - the extreme stuff Masochists/subs are supposed to be quiet all the time - LOL S & M is very serious business - yes, it is because of safety issues but there's room for fun and laughter, too Sadists are mean and masochists are extreme S&M isn’t always about sharp pain - it can be about torture and fear in a variety of forms: Edged/forced orgasms Mind fucks Teasing Humiliation play Tickling Sensation play Impact play S&M can cause pain in one of three ways: physical, mental, or emotional (or a combination) - another reason to play very safe and use safewords and give aftercare Dom Space - hyper focused on submissive and the scene Sub Space - high on feel good chemicals Links from the show: The Wood Dom - John Brownstone's Etsy shop - use code WOODDOM for 20% off $25 purchase (November 2016 only!) Try These Kinky Forced Orgasm Scenarios (Kinkly) You Don't Have to Like All Kinds of Pain to Call Yourself a Masochist (Kinkly) Spankings (podcast episode) Follow Kayla on Twitter