Episodes

Two aging punks come to grips with who they once were…and what they’ve become today. Content Advisory: Swearing. Drug and alcohol use. A small fight. Mention of violence (a large, back-alley fight). Midlife crisis. Dissatisfaction with work and life. * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Punk Rock Opera Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund

As I close in on having a readable draft of the current novel-in-progress, I’m changing the schedule for Not about Lumberjacks until I am done with the book. Until I’m ready to return to a monthly schedule, stories will be released every-other month. I hope you understand…

All but three little things are true in “Bobo.” Find out what those things are, why I quit clowning, and…how I measure success today.

A kid’s party clown comes to grips with what he’s become. Content Advisory: Swearing. Mention of alcohol use. Bullying. Mention of attending a strip club. Childhood trauma brought on by a clown. * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund The “Fuck You, Clown!” Drive-By Duo: Zane and Tim Czarnecki. (Because nothing says father and son moment better than swearing at a clown…)

“El Concusso” is one of the few things I’ve written directly for somebody. Here’s the story behind the story…

A professional wrestler can’t remember who he is after hitting his head against the ringpost during a match in Mexico City. Content Advisory: Cartoonish violence (professional wrestling) and a car accident resulting in hospitalization. * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund

A real book inspired “The Art of the Lumberjack.” That book? The Sport of Falconry. According to the inscription, the book was given to me by my father on January 11, 1975. This four-and-a-half minute episode is about how a book I’ve had for 41 years led to one of the best short stories I’ve ever written…

A year ago, I posted the first Not about Lumberjacks story. In honor of the show’s anniversary, I keep with tradition and refuse to even mention those foul-mouthed tree droppers! When Erik Nilsson has a minor heart attack and is told to take some forced time off of work to recuperate, he finally reads a book left to him by his father much earlier in life. What he finds hidden among the pages changes him forever… Content Advisory: Mention of suicide by shotgun. Overbearing parent (mother). Prot...

This time, I sit down and chat with Cynthia Griffith about recording an audio drama instead of a narrated work of prose. It’s the longest episode of Behind the Cut, but it gives a good peek at the process behind putting an audio drama together. And remember, in a few weeks it’s the next Not about Lumberjacks story. It was written for a special occasion: the one-year anniversary of the show!

In honor of Halloween: a podcaster discovers some ghostly audio while editing an episode of his show… Content Advisory: Swearing, crude humor, spouses arguing, an old ghost created by violent means (violence against a woman). * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story: Christopher Gronlund Narration: Christopher Gronlund and Cynthia Griffith (Wife and all Ghosts) Additional Voice Talent: Rick Coste (The Three-Step Dick and Ghosthunter #1), Rocky Westbrook (Ghosthunter #2), and...

If you listened to “Purvis,” it’s probably clear that I spent a lot of time when I was younger playing Dungeons and Dragons and being picked on. If you’ve not listened to “Purvis,” I suggest you listen to the story first because there are some big spoilers in this behind-the-scenes look at the story. But this is not wholly about what it was to be bullied — it’s also a celebration of a game that saved my life and made me the person I am today.

In 1984, a Dungeon Master struggles with keeping the few friendships he has together, all while dealing with a vicious bully. When Dungeons and Dragons is your only reprieve from the cruelties of life, the game becomes much more than recreation: it becomes a place of salvation. Content Advisory: This story is rough. It contains swearing, alcoholism, child abuse, teasing, bullying, obsession, depression, misogyny, violence (classroom fighting and a brutal fight at the end), and the death of the ...

As far as I can remember, “Shadow Dancers” was the first story I wrote around the time I was 20 and decided to make writing a serious pursuit. I talk about those early days of writing and how this is one of the few stories my father read before he died. He wasn’t keen on the idea of my giving up studying biology to write, but this story changed his mind.

Find out what happens when four boys figure out how to separate their shadows from their bodies… [All Ages] Content Advisory: I suppose some people might not be down with kids doing magic… * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund

Fly Me to the Moon came about in an old writing group. Find out how three basic elements led to the story…and how different it was from other stories composed of the same pieces. (Also, find out how Mad Man Morgan got his name…)

A homeless man who talks with birds is convinced he can talk with his dead wife on the moon…if only he can fix a broken radio he found in a dumpster. Content Advisory: Swearing, mention of alcohol use, depression, dementia, death of a spouse, suicide involving a grotesque brain penetration. * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund

“Standstill” is one of those stories that turned into something more than I expected. People seem to really like this story, and I must say I like it enough that I want to do more with it in the future. I’ve bumped into that problem with all the new stories I’ve written for Not About Lumberjacks. (It’s not a bad problem to have…)

When she was 18 — for her high school graduation — Maddy was given a pocket watch by her grandfather…along with the warning that it does more than just tell time. Eighteen years later, she uses the button on the watch her grandfather told her to use with caution. What happens after clicking the button changes the lives of Maddy and her husband, Aaron. A heartfelt tale about time and love…and the effect the two things have on us all… Content Advisory: Swearing, sudden onset of cancer, death of...

On June 7, 2016, I gave a talk to the Podcast Dallas Meetup about podcasting fiction. If you come here for the stories and this doesn’t sound like your kind of thing, I understand. But if you’ve wondered what all goes into creating an episode of Not About Lumberjacks, this is a little peek behind the curtain. I’m making the talk available as an audio file for those on the go, but if you’d like to hear the talk while also looking at the accompanying slides, here it is:

Sometimes the weight of everyday life catches up with you and, instead of posting the story you intended to post, you end up sharing something older. Some thoughts about twists in stories, the rush of everyday life, and how sometimes the best defense against it all is simplicity.

An exhausted single father comes to grips with his children and dating issues during a visit to his psychologist. Content Advisory: Swearing, parental expectations. * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund

This episode of Behind the Cut ranks up there with the “Horus” episode (in which I interviewed Cynthia Griffith about narrating the story and tackling the voice of a parrot). What makes this current story and look behind the story so special to me? I interviewed Mark Hosack, Shawn Kupfer, and Rick Coste about a strange request I made to them: I know it’s short notice, but can you read these lines of orc dialogue and then grunt and laugh like an orc for the next episode of Not About Lumberjacks...

Daniel’s life was not going very well. Not only did his wife divorce him, but he was laid off from his job. With few cares about what would happen to him if caught, he breaks into his childhood home to see if something once in his bedroom closet is still there. Content Advisory: Swearing, divorce, depression, fantasy violence, alcohol use, fantasy deaths, work/life struggles. * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund Orcs: Rick Coste, Mark H...

Find out why “Rabbit Eyes” was written, and how this recording differs from the original manuscript.