Episodes

Tony reads a message from a listener who asks, "why won't their therapist confront their narcissistic spouse?". He explains more of the origin story of narcissism and how the path of the narcissist leads them to a place where they can't possibly be the problem and why, if you confront the narcissist, it can make matters worse. If you are interested in being coached in Tony's upcoming "Magnetic Marriage Podcast," please email him for more information. You will receive free marriage coaching and r...

Can communication be a form of violence? According to communication expert Marshall Rosenberg it can if you consider "violence" to include attempts at cutting others down to size and/or coercing them into doing what we want. Tony discusses "Nonviolent Communication," and the importance of separating an observation from a judgement, something that narcissists, or highly emotionally immature people struggle to do in an attempt to manage their own anxiety. Tony references Pamela Hobart's review of ...

Tony is the interviewee on Michaela Renee Johnson's "Be You Find Happy" podcast. From the show notes on Michaela's episode, "Ha, got your attention. If you're asking yourself that you're probably not, but you might be in a relationship with someone who is "less emotionally mature." It seems narcissism is on the rise but is it? More and more people are waking up to toxic relationships no doubt and leaving one of these relationships in the words of Doctor Ramani is like "hugging a porcupine, you'v...

Sarah Doucette, author of the book "Stronger Than That: A Domestic Violence Survivor Uncovers the Truth About Her Abuser" https://amzn.to/3FoX5MI joins Tony to share her "harrowing story of a domestic victim's search for the truth about her marriage. Twenty-one-year-old Sarah Doucette married a charming, gregarious and attentive man. Six years later, she left the marriage, lucky to be alive. Suffering from PTSD and dissociation after years of physical and emotional abuse, Sarah could barely reme...

Tony shares more examples of how being in a relationship with a narcissist can feel like "death by a thousand cuts." It can be extremely difficult to explain what it's like to be in a relationship with someone who exhibits narcissistic traits and tendencies, is highly emotionally immature, or has a full-blown narcissistic personality disorder. When taken individually, incidents may seem petty, or to someone who has never been in a similar relationship, they may feel like you're being unfair. But...

Tony answers a listener's question about the difference between "throwing the narcissist under the bus" and listening, validating, and empathizing with a frustrated child of a narcissistic parent. He also answers questions about why narcissists often employ the silent treatment, as well as can a narcissist get along well with another narcissist? Tony mentioned his presentation in Monica Tanner's "Secrets of Happily Ever After," summit which brings 32 marriage therapists and life/relationship coa...

Tony explains the “amygdala hijack,” or why it feels like you quickly lose control of your emotions when trying to communicate, or sometimes be around, the narcissist in your life. Is there anything that you can do in the moment, or do you need to simply give yourself grace that it happened, review the “game film” afterward, and make a plan…or c) all of the above? Tony references the article “All About Amygdala Hijack,” by Traci Pedersen, medically reviewed by Bethany Juby, PsyD https://psychcen...

Tony reads a letter from a listener who touches on several aspects of waking up to the narcissism in their relationship. Tony covers his five rules of interacting with a narcissist, gaslighting, emotional immaturity, what happens when someone begins working on themself in a relationship with a narcissist, and why it can be so challenging to break free from unhealthy relationships in general. Tony mentioned his presentation in Monica Tanner's "Secrets of Happily Ever After," summit which brings 3...

Tony reads a letter from a listener who touches on several aspects of waking up to the narcissism in their relationship. Tony covers his five rules of interacting with a narcissist, gaslighting, emotional immaturity, what happens when someone begins working on themself in a relationship with a narcissist, and why it can be so challenging to break free from unhealthy relationships in general. Tony mentioned his presentation in Monica Tanner's "Secrets of Happily Ever After," summit which brings 3...

Tony reads a letter from a listener who touches on several aspects of waking up to the narcissism in their relationship. Tony covers his five rules of interacting with a narcissist, gaslighting, emotional immaturity, what happens when someone begins working on themself in a relationship with a narcissist, and why it can be so challenging to break free from unhealthy relationships in general. Tony mentioned his presentation in Monica Tanner's "Secrets of Happily Ever After," summit which brings 3...

Tony welcomes Nate Christensen, APCC, back to the podcast to discuss self-care. Nate shares "The Wellness Model" and how the acronym "POSIES" touches on several areas of self-care that can be incredibly effective when dealing with emotionally immature or narcissistic people in your life. POSIES addresses the need for self-care in the following areas: Physical, Occupational/Financial, Social, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual. Tony gives the origin story of his "Emotional Baseline Theory," w...

Tony welcomes Nate Christensen, APCC, back to the podcast to discuss self-care. Nate shares "The Wellness Model" and how the acronym "POSIES" touches on several areas of self-care that can be incredibly effective when dealing with emotionally immature or narcissistic people in your life. POSIES addresses the need for self-care in the following areas: Physical, Occupational/Financial, Social, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual. Tony gives the origin story of his "Emotional Baseline Theory," w...

Tony welcomes Nate Christensen, APCC, back to the podcast to discuss self-care. Nate shares "The Wellness Model" and how the acronym "POSIES" touches on several areas of self-care that can be incredibly effective when dealing with emotionally immature or narcissistic people in your life. POSIES addresses the need for self-care in the following areas: Physical, Occupational/Financial, Social, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual. Tony gives the origin story of his "Emotional Baseline Theory," w...

Tony walks through Kristin Milstead's Expanded Narcissistic Cycle of Abuse from her article "Why You Can't Leave the Narcissist in Your Life" https://fairytaleshadows.com/why-you-cant-leave-the-narcissist-in-your-life/ Go to http://tonyoverbay.com/workshop to sign up for Tony's "Magnetize Your Marriage" virtual workshop. The cost is only $19, and you'll learn the top 3 things you can do NOW to create a Magnetic Marriage. With the continuing "sheltering" rules spreading across the country, PLEASE...

Tony walks through Kristin Milstead's Expanded Narcissistic Cycle of Abuse from her article "Why You Can't Leave the Narcissist in Your Life" https://fairytaleshadows.com/why-you-cant-leave-the-narcissist-in-your-life/ Go to http://tonyoverbay.com/workshop to sign up for Tony's "Magnetize Your Marriage" virtual workshop. The cost is only $19, and you'll learn the top 3 things you can do NOW to create a Magnetic Marriage. With the continuing "sheltering" rules spreading across the country, PLEASE...

Tony walks through Kristin Milstead's Expanded Narcissistic Cycle of Abuse from her article "Why You Can't Leave the Narcissist in Your Life" https://fairytaleshadows.com/why-you-cant-leave-the-narcissist-in-your-life/ Go to http://tonyoverbay.com/workshop to sign up for Tony's "Magnetize Your Marriage" virtual workshop. The cost is only $19, and you'll learn the top 3 things you can do NOW to create a Magnetic Marriage. With the continuing "sheltering" rules spreading across the country, PLEASE...

Tony shares an email from a listener who says that her "waking up" to the narcissism in her relationship saved her life. She shares how her relationship gradually shifted from good to a place where she regularly questioned her sanity. Plus, Tony discusses the "Maddening and Bizarre Things Narcissists Do" by Julie Hall from the Narcissist Family Files https://narcissistfamilyfiles.com/2019/01/30/maddening-and-bizarre-things-about-narcissists-explained/ Go to http://tonyoverbay.com/workshop to sig...

Tony shares an email from a listener who says that her "waking up" to the narcissism in her relationship saved her life. She shares how her relationship gradually shifted from good to a place where she regularly questioned her sanity. Plus, Tony discusses the "Maddening and Bizarre Things Narcissists Do" by Julie Hall from the Narcissist Family Files https://narcissistfamilyfiles.com/2019/01/30/maddening-and-bizarre-things-about-narcissists-explained/ Go to http://tonyoverbay.com/workshop to sig...

Tony shares an email from a listener who says that her "waking up" to the narcissism in her relationship saved her life. She shares how her relationship gradually shifted from good to a place where she regularly questioned her sanity. Plus, Tony discusses the "Maddening and Bizarre Things Narcissists Do" by Julie Hall from the Narcissist Family Files https://narcissistfamilyfiles.com/2019/01/30/maddening-and-bizarre-things-about-narcissists-explained/ Go to http://tonyoverbay.com/workshop to sig...

Is there such a thing as a "nice narcissist?" Or are they on par with other mythical creatures like Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster? Tony goes on a deep dive into Dr. Elinor Greenberg's article "White Knight & Black Knights: Pro-Social & Anti-Social NPD," https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/understanding-narcissism/201804/white-knights-black-knights-pro-social-anti-social-npd and he starts the episode with another listener example of narcissistic confabulation and references the article "C...

Is there such a thing as a "nice narcissist?" Or are they on par with other mythical creatures like Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster? Tony goes on a deep dive into Dr. Elinor Greenberg's article "White Knight & Black Knights: Pro-Social & Anti-Social NPD," https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/understanding-narcissism/201804/white-knights-black-knights-pro-social-anti-social-npd and he starts the episode with another listener example of narcissistic confabulation and references the article "C...

Is there such a thing as a "nice narcissist?" Or are they on par with other mythical creatures like Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster? Tony goes on a deep dive into Dr. Elinor Greenberg's article "White Knight & Black Knights: Pro-Social & Anti-Social NPD," https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/understanding-narcissism/201804/white-knights-black-knights-pro-social-anti-social-npd and he starts the episode with another listener example of narcissistic confabulation and references the article "C...

Tony answers questions from his private Facebook group on everything from discovering your self-worth post-narcissism, how you can trust again in your new relationships, levels of intimacy, and more. Go to http://tonyoverbay.com/workshop to sign up for Tony's "Magnetize Your Marriage" virtual workshop. The cost is only $19. You'll learn the top 3 things you can do NOW to create a Magnetic Marriage. With the continuing "sheltering" rules spreading across the country, PLEASE do not think you can't...

Tony answers questions from his private Facebook group on everything from discovering your self-worth post-narcissism, how you can trust again in your new relationships, levels of intimacy, and more. Go to http://tonyoverbay.com/workshop to sign up for Tony's "Magnetize Your Marriage" virtual workshop. The cost is only $19. You'll learn the top 3 things you can do NOW to create a Magnetic Marriage. With the continuing "sheltering" rules spreading across the country, PLEASE do not think you can't...