Episodes

What does it look like for men to turn concern about violence against women into action? Timba returns for Episode 2 of Series 5 of In Conversations About Family Violence – You Do Not Have To Put Up With It, sharing why he walked for the Women’s and Girls’ Emergency Centre (WAGEC) and raised $2,007 to support women and children escaping violence. Behind his participation are people he cares about: friends who have experienced abuse, women living in fear, and those killed by men whose deaths le...

What does it mean to speak up against violence—and what happens when you do? When artist and writer Timba Smits challenged abusive behaviour on a London bus, he was attacked and left with life-threatening stab wounds. Fifteen years later, he shares the ongoing impact of that violence and why he wants men to take an active role in preventing it. Opening Series 5 of In Conversations About Family Violence – You Do Not Have To Put Up With It, Timber speaks candidly about surviving violence, the un...

In Series 4, Episode 2 of In Conversations About Family Violence: You Don’t Have to Put Up With It, DFV Lawyers’ founder and principal lawyer Ms Carmella speaks with clinical psychotherapist Adriana about the therapeutic side of recovery from domestic and family violence. They explore how trauma can affect identity, trust, emotional regulation and everyday life; how practitioners establish safety and rapport; and why meaningful recovery often requires sustained, wraparound support. The conversa...

Family violence recovery requires more than a legal response. In this episode, a family violence lawyer introduces counsellor Emma and the vital role of therapeutic and clinical support for people affected by domestic and family violence. The episode frames how psychologists, psychotherapists and counsellors can help clients stabilise, understand trauma-related responses and begin rebuilding their lives. It considers therapeutic care alongside legal processes, intervention-order matters, safety...

Psychological harm is real, profound and legally recognised. In this episode, Ms Carmella explains how fear, isolation, degradation and exposure to violence impact adults and children—even when no physical injuries occur. For more information or assistance with domestic family violence issues, visit www.domesticfamilyviolencelawyers.au

Surveillance is not care—it’s control. In this episode, Ms Carmella explores digital monitoring, location tracking, password demands, and tech‑based coercive control, and explains the legal protections available to victims. For more information or assistance with domestic family violence issues, visit www.domesticfamilyviolencelawyers.au

Financial contribution does not cancel out coercive control. Ms Carmella explains economic abuse, financial dependence, and how “being a provider” is often used to mask intimidation, restriction and punishment. For more information or assistance with domestic family violence issues, visit www.domesticfamilyviolencelawyers.au

False allegations are rare; under‑reporting is common. Ms Carmella in this episode unpacks how this myth harms victims, misleads courts, and undermines safety. Essential listening for anyone navigating family law or DFV systems. For more information or assistance with domestic family violence issues, visit www.domesticfamilyviolencelawyers.au

Substance use and mental health issues may increase risk, but they do not excuse violence. In this episode, Ms Carmella breaks down accountability, risk factors, and why courts treat violence as a choice—not a symptom. For more information or assistance with domestic family violence issues, visit www.domesticfamilyviolencelawyers.au

Leaving is often the most dangerous time. Ms Carmella in this episode explores why victims stay—fear, children, finances, threats, disability, migration status—and why staying is a survival strategy, not a measure of severity. For more information or assistance with domestic family violence issues, visit www.domesticfamilyviolencelawyers.au

Conflict is mutual. Violence is not. Ms Carmella explains the difference between healthy disagreement and coercive control, and why treating abuse as “mutual conflict” hides risk, silences victims, and distorts legal responses. For more information or assistance with domestic family violence issues, visit www.domesticfamilyviolencelawyers.au

Anger, stress, alcohol or jealousy are often used to excuse violence. Ms Carmella breaks down why family violence is not about “losing control” but about patterns of entitlement, intimidation and power. A critical look at accountability and the myths that protect abusive behaviour. For more information or assistance with domestic family violence issues, visit www.domesticfamilyviolencelawyers.au

Family violence is far broader than physical assault. In this episode, Ms Carmella explains coercive control, non‑physical abuse, and how Victorian law defines family violence through fear, domination and impact—not injuries. A foundational episode for understanding modern DFV frameworks. For more information or assistance with domestic family violence issues, visit www.domesticfamilyviolencelawyers.au

Welcome to our Podcast series In Conversations about Family Violence -You Do Not Have To Put Up with It” - hosted by Ms Carmella, Principal Lawyer & Director, Founder of DFV Lawyers. Our podcast series 3 focuses on Understanding Family Violence: The Myths & Misconceptions and Lived Realities. In this series, we unpack the myths that continue to shape how people understand, minimise, or excuse family violence. These myths harm victim survivors, distort public understanding, and undermine accoun...

In this concluding episode of Series Two of You Don’t Have to Put Up With It, Ms Carmella of DFV Lawyers reflects on the powerful client experiences shared throughout the series and the broader challenges people face when navigating domestic and family violence matters in Victoria. Across the series, listeners heard from both applicants and a respondent about coercive control, manipulation, emotional abuse, intimidation, fear, isolation, system navigation and the lasting personal impact of fami...

In this important episode of You Do Not Have to Put Up With It, Ms Carmella from DFV Lawyers examines a difficult and often uncomfortable issue within the family violence system: the weaponisation of intervention orders. Intervention orders exist to protect adults and children from family violence, reduce further harm, and promote accountability for those who use violence. But in some cases, these orders are misused deliberately, strategically and harmfully for reasons unrelated to safety. Car...

In this confronting episode of You Do Not Have to Put Up With It, Ms Carmella from DFV Lawyers speaks with “Gary,” a former client who shares his experience as a male survivor of family violence. Gary describes how conflict in his relationship escalated into intimidation, objects being thrown, fear, emotional distress and a growing sense that he could not safely remain in his own home. He also speaks candidly about the shame and disbelief many men can experience when trying to disclose abuse, p...

In this powerful episode of You Do Not Have to Put Up With It, Miss Carmella from DFVLawyers speaks with “Rebecca,” a family violence survivor who shares her lived experience of coercive control, emotional abuse, financial dependence, isolation and rebuilding life after separation. Rebecca describes how she went from being independent, confident and professionally capable to feeling isolated, anxious and trapped inside a relationship where her movements, money, friendships and choices were incr...

In this powerful opening episode of Series Two of You Do Not Have to Put Up With It, Ms Carmella Acciarito from DFVLawyers speaks with “Maggie,” a former client and family violence survivor, about the hidden realities of coercive control, emotional abuse, isolation, manipulation and the long road to recovery. Maggie shares how a relationship that appeared supportive at first gradually eroded her independence, confidence and sense of self. She discusses the early warning signs she now recognises...

In this episode of In Conversations About Family Violence: You Do Not Have to Put Up With It, Miss Carmella, Founder and Director of DFV Lawyers, introduces a special podcast series focused on four forthcoming book publications addressing domestic and family violence from legal, educational, practitioner and community perspectives. The episode outlines four connected works: a comprehensive guide for family violence practitioners, a courtroom-focused case study resource, a community-facing book ...

In this episode, Miss Carmella, Founder, Director and Principal Family Violence and Criminal Lawyer of DfE Lawyers, introduces the next series of vital conversations about domestic and family violence in Victoria. This series focuses on coercive control, intimidation, and the hidden forms of violence experienced by men, women and non-binary people from diverse cultural and religious communities in intimate relationships. Featuring four clients who bravely share their lived experiences, the seri...

In this concluding episode of the six-part podcast series In Conversations About Family Violence, Miss Carmella, Founder, Director and Principal Family Violence and Criminal Lawyer of DFV Lawyers, reflects on the purpose and impact of this landmark series. Created as an accessible, evidence-based and trauma-informed resource, the series explores the escalating crisis of domestic and family violence in Victoria, across Australia, and globally. Across the episodes, listeners are guided through th...

From Family Violence Intervention Orders to support services and everything in between, in this, the final part of our six-part series on domestic and family violence, we provide a clear, simple guide on what happens after Victoria Police attend a family violence incident, and how they continue to support your safety. For more information, visit https://domesticfamilyviolencelawyers.au

In this, the fifth part of our series on domestic and family violence, we look at real-world tips for responding to family violence in Victoria. We cover: Safety priorities Warnings signs Support options Legal protections The importance of having a plan and much, much more. For more information, visit https://domesticfamilyviolencelawyers.au