Episodes

"Where you look, you tend to go." That's what happens with your judgment and your design.

Are you listening to God or someone other than God? Does that question sound familiar? It should, because it is basically the fundamental question or choice for life—"Am I trusting God or something or someone other than God?"

Significance is a key need of a man! That is why the judgment for man is so powerful. His testosterone based design drives him to be significant, especially in his relationship with a woman. He tries to get his significance especially through his work and activities. Put his judgment with her judgment, desiring the safety of fulfilling relationships and no wonder marriages and relationships fail.

The judgment on women is not some abstract theory. As stated last week, it is REALITY. A woman wants to have fulfilling relationships with her children and husband, but with the influence of the judgments, it turns into CONTROL.

After Adam and Eve sinned in the Garden of Eden, God pronounced the consequences to the serpent, Eve and then Adam. In Genesis 3:16, God shares a truth that impacts all women that live, have lived or will live. The degree that this bad news impacts a woman is directly related to how much a woman trusts herself and not God. God initiated this judgment on women, but He has provided the solution also.

Submission makes life about others because it follows the example of Jesus Christ. It applies to both men and women, slaves and masters, husbands and wives. Unfortunately, it's not spoken of correctly and, therefore, becomes a weapon to be used primarily against women.

Submission is the "S" word that is often used against women, especially wives. It is obviously misunderstood when used to try to force a change in behavior.

As some have asked, "Can I have it all and Jesus too?" The answer to that question depends on how you define "all"? Does it mean having the lifestyle of the rich and famous, what the world says is the life to attain to? Or, does it mean the eternal "all", things that God says are the real values of life—like the fruit of the Spirit.

When you read parts of the Bible it's easy to think, "Does that really apply today?" Especially Western societies, it's really easy to think that when reading Titus 2:4 where God is asking young women to be "...homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed." That can't be relevant for today, can it?

Even though the 1960's and 1970's may have coined the term "feminism", there is nothing new about it. And, even as Barbara Walters recently stated that feminism is an outdated word, the attitudes and ideas will remain until Christ returns.

God's Word clearly esteems mothers and women who focus their attention on the home. This does not mean that a women who works outside the is displeasing God. The issue is more an attitude of the heart rather than a choice between work or home. The Proverbs 31 wife was doing work outside the home, but her focus was primarily on the home, husband, and family.

This is the same thing God desires of older men. Why does God want this from the older believers (in age or spiritual maturity)? Because it is linked to verse 1—sound doctrine. When you are older in age or spiritual maturity, it makes sense that you should have learned how to act properly. Sound doctrine is God's word showing up in everyday life. That means you are decent in your conduct, clothing, actions, looks, and speech. Outward conduct driven from inward Godly principles.

The power of a REAL woman is significant, but that power does not come from being beautiful and sexy, it comes from helping. The world wants women to focus on the external, but God wants women to focus on the internal. He wants women to be just like Him—a HELPER!

Powerful is a key message of the world to women. Be powerful in order to protect yourself. And, that message is displayed in two forms—1) Powerful and Sexy or 2) Powerful not Sexy.

If you are focused on being respected—trying to get people to respect you—that's a fickle and dangerous game to play. You will end up being controlled by other people's values in order to gain their respect. Worse, the rules of the game are ambiguous and arbitrary, because what is respected today may not be tomorrow.

REAL men are clear on what really matters, and guess what, everything that really matters is non-material. In fact, you may already know that everything that is most valuable does not require any money—like the fruit of the Spirit.

REAL men don't love because someone deserves it. No matter how a person is acting ("love your enemies"), and sometimes you may think even your wife is your enemy, you still pursue their best. Love is not dependent on how you FEEL, because love is a DECISION.

REAL men aren't "Flashing their ME", they are selfless as they display the image of God (Powerful and Relational). The traits of a REAL man demonstrate that in spite of his powerful design (testosterone), he is asked to be relational also. Both can only be done through the power of the Holy Spirit living the life of Christ that we have been given.

Culture is drowning in gender confusion. What is a REAL man or REAL woman? There is certainly no desire to find the answer in God's Word, because culture would never consider God's Word as the "Who said so".

Like a knife and fork are designed differently for different purposes, God did the same with men and women. But, the world has no desire to promote clarity about the differences between men and women. And, Satan does not want those differences celebrated, because it is a celebration of the image of God. Men's design represents the Powerful elements of God's image and women's design represents the Relational elements of God's image.

Based on some great research by Kenneth Thomas and Ralph Kilmann, there are 5 conflict styles that people use. Based on your development, you will learn to use some more than others. Generally, people will overuse some and under use others. Here is the most important news - all of the styles are good. All of them have problems and benefits, so you need to learn to use each one for the right situation.

Based on some great research by Kenneth Thomas and Ralph Kilmann, there are 5 conflict styles that people use. Based on your development, you will learn to use some more than others. Generally, people will overuse some and under use others. Here is the most important news - all of the styles are good. All of them have problems and benefits, so you need to learn to use each one for the right situation.

What do you think about when you hear the word "conflict?" Most people would list words like fight, anger, war, bad feelings, strife, etc. Conflict is most often thought of as something negative, but it doesn't need to be that way. In fact, conflict can be constructive and beneficial if you have the right thinking.

The best way to start resolving a conflict is to get your thinking changed. While we do not provide you the entire Conflict RESOLVED workshop, we do provide you the first step - remember 3+3+2. Remember 3 Critical Principles, 3 Cardinal Rules and 2 Essential Skills.