Episodes

Perhaps no invention of the 21st century has had a more profound impact on relationships than social media. Part of the challenge is that it tends to place relationships under a microscope for all the world to see while heightening the emotional stakes greatly. In this episode, Alvean and Doug try to bring a reality check for listeners who find themselves in the midst of a unfolding drama that perhaps they did not bargain for. For a full transcript, click here: 64-Relationships and Social Media

It is a big step and it can lead to a stronger and more durable realtionship or reveal fundamental issues. In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss the pitfalls and blessings of living together as a step in the progression of a loving relationship. Fora a complete transcript, click here: 63-Moving In Together

Do you show your love with physical affections, acts of service, gifts or in some other ways? These are different languages by which we express our love for another. There are no better or worse, right or wrong ways, but knowing how you and your mate express your feelings can be of enormous help in assuring you are communicating your feelings clearly. Alvean and Doug offer a primer on the love languages and how they affect relationships. For a full transcript, click here: 66-The Love Languages

Do you find yourself complicit in helping your loved ones engage in or continue to do things which you know are not in their best interests? If so, you may be an enabler. We may feel trapped into this behavior, or find that our desire to please takes us down a path where we are harming more than helping. In this episode, Alvean and Doug help listeners recognize the signs and discuss the ways in which one can help without hurting a loved one. For a full transcript, click here: 67-Are you an Enabl...

Have you ever pictured the person that would be your ideal mate? What makes them ideal, and what does that reveal about you? If you are in a relationship now, how does this person compare? In this episode, Alvean and Doug tackle these and similar questions that probe the borders of our emotional landscape. For a full transcript, click here: LL62-Your ideal mate

Couples who have been in a long and loving relationship often say that their significant other is their best friend. in the age of social media, what does being a friend really mean? In this episode, Alvean and Doug take on that question and offer some thoughts about the value of friendship in our romantic and otherwise personal lives. For a transcript, click here: LL61-Are you a good friend?

Love comes in many forms and times in our lives but true, sustained and deep love is both rare and enduring. How does one tell the difference, and how what are the lessons we can take from those couples that have experienced true love? In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about both their own personal experience of true love and offer some insight on how to create an emotional climate that will foster true love.

When couples decide to merge families and children from one or both partners become part of a new family things can go smoothly or very badly depending on how parent's prepare for the changes ahead. In this episode, Alvean and Doug offer their thoughts on the process and strategies for creating inclusion and acceptance.

Ideally as we age together in a relationship we grow closer and stronger. But people do not always age equally, and how we look at another, our sense of attraction and our acceptance of those changes can sometimes add challenges. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about how those changes can affect couples and how they can learn to grow closer and even more bonded as they age.

Men (and women) can often be difficult to read. They say or do one thing but mean something entirely different. Learning to read the differences between what people say and what they feel takes some practice but there are ways to read the clues as subtle as they may be at times. Alvean and Doug offer a guide book to the obvious and less clear signals we send , even when we think we are being discrete and suggest ways to help our partners reveal their innermost feelings in an environment built on...

In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about passive/aggressive behavior and offer insights on how best to address this toxic form of relationship. For a full transcript and more, click here: 68-The Passive-Aggressive Partner

It is a pervasive influence on our lives and some would say not a healthy one. How does participation in social media affect our lives and our relationships for better or for worse? Alvean and Doug discuss the subject and offer some thoughts on how to navigate this fraught space in a healthy and productive manner. For more and a complete transcript, click here: 64-Relationships and Social Media

Some have said that Parenthood is the last of the unskilled occupations. How do we prepare ourselves, how do we take on the necessary wisdom to raise our children to become successful and happy adults? To answer these and other questions, Alvean and Doug offer real world examples from their own and others’ lives in this episode. For a full transcript, click here: 65-Parenthood

It is a momentous step and one that can make or break a relationship. Accommodating another person’s habits, posessions, and space put our affections to the test and what may be acceptable when we live apart is strained when we live together. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about the stresses and pitfalls of moving in together but also the many rewards and sweetness that can accompany this step if couples are prepared. For more on this topic and a full transcript, click here: 63-Moving In ...

For some it is acts of service, for others affirmation, gifts of touch, or quality time. These are the ways we express our affection and affirm our love. But they are not always acknowledged, valued or understood by couples and a mismatch between what is desired and what is received can be fatal to an enduring relationship. In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss the languages of love, how we show and how we receive these gifts–and most importantly how we can align ourselves so that we are spea...

The path to hell they say is paved with good intentions. Too often we make the mistake of enabling a loved one to continue to harbor destructive –even self destructive habits or patterns of behavior. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about the ways in which our good intentions can result in the worst results for those we love. Enabling robs those we love of self determination, reinforces their bad habits, and shields them from the reality of their lives. For more on this subject and a full t...

How many of us have idealized the perfect mate, and found that our dream curdled in reality? That is the question Alvean and Doug tackle in this episode. Is it possible to find such a person, and if and when we do will they measure up to reality? Who is the ideal mate in any event? For more on this and a full transcript, click here: LL62-Your ideal mate

In a time when friend may mean someone you know on Facebook, what is a good friend and how do you know if you are one? Alvean and Doug talk about friendship and relationships and how the two relate. For a full transcript, click here: LL61-Are you a good friend?

For many couples that moment when one decides that its time to begin living together can be a fraught–even difficult navigation–even if it is something both desire. Adjusting to someone else’s routines, habits, and life style is not always a seamless and easy proposition. In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss the challenges and strategies for navigating them to help couples enjoy a smoother transition from single-hood to couple-hood. For a full transcript, click here: 63-Moving In Together

And Baby makes three, so the saying goes. That precious moment, however, is not without its challenges–especially for couples experiencing parenthood for the first time. It can elicit latent fears, create tensions where none existed before –interfere with careers, health and fray the edges of relationships, but it can also be the culmination of dreams, and blessing. Finding your way through the thickets is the subject of this episode–as Alvean and Doug talk about their own experience as Parents ...

One of the more difficult behaviors to address in a relationship is the passive/aggressive partner. Communication with passive aggressive partners is ultimately a difficult proposition that stands everything on its head and if unchecked can lead to dissolution, a bad breakup or worse due to latent anger and its effect. In this episode, Alvean and Doug help listeners recognize the signs of this behavior and offer advice on how best to counter it in order to get to a healthier place. For a full tr...

Social Media is omnipresent in our lives and while it can help us maintain our involvement with friends and famil, it can also be a toxic wasteland spreading mis information and echoing unhealthy views or outright propaganda. In this episode Alvean and Doug talk about the ways social media bear on relationships and how to make the best use of the medium without undue influence or harm. Fir a complete transcript of this episode, click here: 64-Relationships and Social Media

Perhaps you heard that everyone has different ways of expressing their love, some through acts others through gifts, some through verbal expression and so on. In this episode Alvean and Doug discuss the various love languages and how couples can learn to understand and accept the expressions of their partner, especially when they may not speak the same language. For more and a full transcript. click here: 66-The Love Languages

Sometimes we want so much to do everything possible for our loved ones that we end up serving their best interest poorly. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about enabling and how you can identify whether or not you may be an enabler wiothout realizing it. For a full transcript, click here: 67-Are you an Enabler?