Episodes

New from Kelly from the Evolution Series on Sober and Unashamed: “Christmas Card” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Christmas Card” To read this and much more, check out our Sober and Unashamed Blog.

In this first episode in a two-part series about the impact of alcohol and the holidays, Sheri and Matt tell stories of Matt’s active addiction, and the trauma, chaos, and nervous system dysregulation alcohol caused. Is there a story that hits home for you? If the alcohol consumption of your partner created chaos, trauma, or nervous-system dysregulation, please take our one-minute survey to find out if you belong in Echoes of Recovery.

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Elephant Around the Christmas Tree” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Elephant Around the Christmas Tree” To read this and much more, check out our Sober and Unashamed Blog.

It is widely believed that we are harder on ourselves than anyone else will ever be on us. How did we get this way? Is the societal conditioning different for women than for men? How does alcohol impact our self doubt? Most importantly, how can we break our negative cycles? If the alcohol consumption of your partner created chaos, trauma, or nervous-system dysregulation, please take our one-minute survey to find out if you belong in Echoes of Recovery.

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Parents Crushing Kids’ Emotional Grit” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Parents Crushing Kids’ Emotional Grit” To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Addiction is a spectrum disorder, and the overwhelming abundance of access to dopamine in our culture means awareness is our only hope. Listen to help you determine where you are on the spectrum with your addictions (hint: if you don’t think you have any addictions, but you do have habits, patterns, and routines, you should probably give this a listen). The tsunami isn’t coming. It’s here. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who underst...

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Masculinity that’s NOT Toxic” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Masculinity that’s NOT Toxic” To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

The results are in! More than physical features, more than financial resources, people are looking for Kindness and Emotional Safety in potential partners and within committed relationships. Matt shares the results of our recent survey taken by many podcast listeners, and Sheri reveals her answers to the research questions. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

New from Sober and Unashamed: “3 Things I Love about Friendsgiving” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “3 Things I Love about Friendsgiving” To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

It is easy to calculate the costs associated with dissolving a relationship, but when people fight to stay together, they often fail to analyze the costs of maintaining the partnership. Sheri and Matt discuss the costs of marriage that linger even after years of individual recovery from alcoholism. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Emotional Safety is a Dying Fad” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Emotional Safety is a Dying Fad” To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Introducing our new quarterly series with listener questions answered by Lara Hammock, licenced clinical social worker and mental health therapist working with both individuals and couples. Topics covered on this episode range from attachment styles to childhood trauma, therapeutic techniques to reestablishing intimacy, and much more. Please send questions for Lara’s next episode to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com. Check out all the tools Lara shares on her website. If you love or loved an alcoholic...

New from Sober and Unashamed: “I Wish She Would Die” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “I Wish She Would Die” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Humans are complicated, and when we lose someone, or separate from someone, we have to reconcile the good memories and the bad. Yes, there is relief that the trauma and toxicity are over. But getting to the feeling of relief…that is a challenge that deserves attention. Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

“I made myself small to cope.” This is a sentiment expressed by the loved ones of alcoholics who get used to walking on egg shells, and also the alcoholics themselves who shrink to avoid detection about the extent of their drinking. Sheri and Matt talk about finding their voices in recovery, including the introduction of the concept of sacrifice as an aspect of Emotional Masculinity. Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your reco...

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Atrophied Intelligence” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Atrophied Intelligence” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

When relationships deteriorate, as frequently happens in an alcoholic marriage, partners often stay together clinging to the romantic fairytale or because of binding dysfunction that makes leaving feel impossible. In this episode, Sheri and Matt highlight 11 common examples. Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

New from Sober and Unashamed: “The Divorce Rate is Too Low” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “The Divorce Rate is Too Low” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

In order for relationships to evolve to meet the demands of consistent emotional safety, many of us need to first understand the assignment. On this episode, Sheri and Matt discuss how masculinity can evolve to provide and protect emotional safety in partnerships and families. Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery progra...

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Bizarre at the Boathouse, Part 2” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Bizarre at the Boathouse, Part 2” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Sex in a committed partnership should never be considered obligatory. Sex should be earned, and on this episode, Sheri and Matt discuss the sequence of events that leads to mutually satisfying sex. If there is drinking in your relationship that is blamed on the lack of sex, this episode is for you. Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Ech...

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Bizarre at the Boathouse, Part 1” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Bizarre at the Boathouse, Part 1” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Lundy Bancroft is the author of the world’s best selling book on domestic violence titled, “Why Does He Do That?” He has spent the last three decades counseling men who abuse and consulting with their victims. On this episode, Lundy explains that, “An active alcoholic will never deal with his abusiveness,” and about a million other fascinating aspects of all kinds of abuse. We bet you’ll be surprised by some of the control and manipulation tactics defined as physical abuse. Click here to take o...

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Progress” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Progress” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.