Episodes

Our society has changed dramatically in the last century, and the gender gap has been almost completely eliminated. But our culture still has some catching up to do. Sheri and Matt explore the concept of emotional masculinity, taking emotional safety to the next level. If you are a man trying to figure out your role or identity, this conversation is for you. Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from co...

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Yummy Summer of Turd” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Yummy Summer of Turd” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

From high school through young adulthood, the pressure felt by people in their teens and 20s is unlike anything experienced by preceding generations. Sheri and Matt offer evidence of the enormous stress of entering adulthood, speculate about the causes, and discuss what we all can do to alleviate the pressure (hint: we can’t wait for government policy intervention). Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit...

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Rubber Stamping a Toxic Culture” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Rubber Stamping a Toxic Culture” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

There is comfort in assigning the blame for relationship dysfunction and emotional abuse on the alcohol or the addiction. But what if we could make a cultural shift to prevent the need for blame and shame? Sheri and Matt discuss what would happen if we added emotional abuse to the list of behaviors that cross a clear red line. Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who underst...

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Senseless Urgency” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Senseless Urgency” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Lara Hammock is a licenced clinical social worker and mental health therapist working with both individuals and couples. She is creative and inventive, and Lara joins Sheri and Matt to share her COME-TO method to complain constructively. Listeners who like a great acronym, and love to hear Sheri tell it like it is, will enjoy hearing Sheri process a real life complaint she has about Matt. Check out all the tools Lara shares on her website, including a download of her COME-TO worksheet. Click he...

New from Sober and Unashamed: “A.B.D.” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “A.B.D.” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Even when done with loving intent, restriction and control does not lead to the desired results of obedience and conformity: restriction leads to rebellion. Just ask anyone ever who has tried to control someone else’s drinking. Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Good Morning, Gorgeous” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Good Morning, Gorgeous” Click here to take our survey on attraction and relationships. To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Sheri answers listener questions about everything from her rock-bottom moments that resulted from Matt’s alcoholism, to what she would do differently if she had the chance to do it all over again. Many answers are emotional because learning and surviving are both painful. Matt lightens things up by starting the episode with a riddle, and an analysis of why people feel unconditional love for their pets. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with peopl...

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Dudes on the Struggle Bus” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Dudes on the Struggle Bus” To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Evolutionary Psychologist Dr. Menelaos Apostolou does research around this unfortunate historical fact: Until sometime in the past 100 years, men had all the sexual power in most cultures around the world. The traditional power dynamic will come as no surprise to our listeners. However, on this episode, Sheri and Matt discuss some disturbing theoretical evolutionary impacts of that inequity that will plague us humans well into the future. We bet you’ve never considered this stuff, stuff exacerba...

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Courtesy Flush” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Courtesy Flush” To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

We’re not rooting for divorce, we are rooting for people to be treated with respect. And in the absence of respect, we are rooting for people to extract themselves from a toxic situation. After they talk through all the relationship problems in recovery, Matt the Gnat makes plans to haul around Sheri’s Cat Cuddle Bus. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program. If you would like ...

New from the Underlying Issues Series on Sober and Unashamed: “(Un)Lone Bone” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “(Un)Lone Bone” To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Maybe people don’t need more instruction about how to do resentment processing. What people need is an acknowledgement of their fear of resentment processing. The fear is quite real, and Sheri and Matt talk all about it. If you would like to vote on the name for Sheri’s cat truck business, please email matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com and choose between the finalists: Cat Cuddle Bus and Tiny Tiger Rolling Litter Labyrinth. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connec...

New from the Underlying Issues Series on Sober and Unashamed: “Bitch” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Bitch” To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Amber Hollingsworth makes her fourth appearance on the podcast to talk about how she developed her innovative approach to addiction recovery that involves both the substance user and the family members. As a licensed addiction counselor with over two decades of experience, if you like what Amber has to say, please check out her Put the Shovel Down YouTube channel. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our ...

Amber Hollingsworth is a licensed addiction counselor who has been working with individuals and families struggling with addiction since 2004. She hosts and produces one of the most valuable resources in the recovery community, the Put the Shovel Down YouTube channel. About Soberlink, Amber says, “It is the most effective tool out there for getting someone sober and keeping them sober. More effective than going to meetings.” Please listen to Amber’s full unsolicited endorsement.

New from the Underlying Issues Series on Sober and Unashamed: “Marriage Rash” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Marriage Rash” To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

“There’s always a but when you’re dealing with an ass.” Sheri explains Matt’s reluctance to seek sobriety support for his active alcoholism. If you hesitate to ask for help, if your partner refuses to engage with a program, or if Sheri’s instant-classic quote resonates for you, please give this episode a listen. Here are the two links promised for the show notes: Matt’s vulnerability rewarded in initial conversations about his alcoholism, and Ep245 – Emotional Abuse with Paul Colaianni. If you...

New from the Underlying Issues Series on Sober and Unashamed: “Keep My Food Out of Your Mouth” We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Keep My Food Out of Your Mouth” To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Live from the 2025 Echoes of Recovery retreat along Bear Creek in the Rocky Mountains our roundtable discusses the challenges of putting their confidence that their partners’ drinking is problematic into the right action steps. It is difficult. It is a process. Please listen if you could use some tips on putting knowing into action. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program. If ...