Episodes

This week on Toilet Radio: My apartment got flooded with my neighbor’s shit and piss / Avenged Sevenfold are BACK and putting together insanely funny concert bills along with some real iffy-sounding music! / Robert Smith goes hard / We cover the latest Rolling Stone list debacle, “The 100 Greatest Heavy Metal Songs of All Time”. We gotta talk about every single entry on this thing, argue about the validity of the choice and the accuracy of the ranking and also try to figure out what the deal is ...

We jack off the horses and get nothing / ROCKLAHOMA where the rock comes sweeping’ down the plain / Ronnie Radke is dragging a bunch of other bands down, is 40 years old / Dave Lombardo’s all-percussion jazz odyssey is going to whip ass / Igorr ain’t gonna pay your damn hell ass merch cut / You only think you’re being screwed on Ticketmaster fees because you’re uneducated / Spotify thinks bands will play for exposure, are sadly correct / Dave Mustaine is on round 8 of trying to sell NFTs / Ash f...

This week on Toilet Radio: Joe supported the scene – huge mistake. / A visit to an early 2000s Hot Topic-themed bar turns sour as we discuss watching your own youth get regurgitated back into your mouth like a lil baby bird / Ash from Sumerian has decided now, three years after he could have made some hay with it, to be an antivax guy. Let’s dive into Ash, Sumerian, and his extremely successful movie director father. / Tim Lambesis has a few new side projects (including one with the giant bodybu...

This week: We’re talking about WEEEEEEEEED, buying roach-infested furniture, and ChristXcore making a come back at Furnace Fest this year in a BIG way. Seriously, there are like a dozen Christian bands from the early 2000s on this fucking thing. Tommy Vext is circling the toilet and we couldn’t be more pleased. Fear Factory angered the gods and go on tour with Twiztid. Finally, Spotify has decided to get even worse and Bandcamp is over in the corner making big strides. We talk about the streamin...

This week on Toilet Radio: We talk about Rolling Stone’s horrible “50 Horrible Albums by Brilliant Artists” list. / Nebraskan Man Steals Fake Biker Vest / Dave Mustaine forgot to pay the guy what drew the art for his newest record. / The government aint gonna do shit about Ticketmaster / Periphery is on the forefront of using AI for tacky, cheap purposes / Introducing the newest record label focused on the past: Bluegrape Music / Digby vs Tony Victory at Hell in the Cell / Ronnie Radke wants to ...

Toilet Radio picked six songs, Riff Raff picks six better ones. TR covered the Handegg Championship; RR shits on the World Cup. You decide who’s better—a podcast that plays you six choons every episode 😎, and one that only plays one with about an hour of preamble 🤓 How have you let us get away with this shit for a whole year?!?! It’s actually been longer since Hans and Eenzy made like a couple of auralnecrophiliacs and took over Pat and Kit‘s two-headed baby bird only fly it straight into the te...

This week on the Toilet Radio podcast: Errrmmm, you mean the Superb Owl? / More adventures in trying to sell musical equipment online / Joe Lynn Turner Explains It All: The Illuminati Edition / Reader emails! / Psycho Las Vegas having money problems? I blame that son of a bitch blackjack dealer on The Cortez / Hammerfest (?) in the UK appears to be a huge scam! / MetalSucks published a horseshit chunk of marketing content disguised as a study on heavy metal tours and carbon emissions. We dive in...

This week on Toilet Radio: Shitspinners can go to hell. / Sleep Token: the new Ghost? / Spiritworld: embarrassing! Ozzy is retiring from touring / Crowbar has partnered with a high-end(?) headphones manufacturer to sell heavy metal headphones. / Aaron Lewis, maybe the worst one of Our Guys, got a gold plaque for his song about being the only one. / Milwaukee Metal Fest is causing a big stir. Let’s take a look at the bands announced. / An independent entrepreneur noticed that Century Media doesn’...

This week on Toilet Radio: We discuss Maynard James Keenan’s upcoming Brazilian Jiu Jitsu seminar at a suburban strip mall dojo. For just $200 you can get a free t-shirt! / Pantera got CANCELLED for good reason. We talk about Phil getting the boot from Germany and Austria and their upcoming tour with Lamb of God. / Phil Labonte got some national attention for being a thirsty old loser on Tinder. / Escape the Fate hired an unnamed artist that completely stole that shit whole hog from Cameron Gray...

This week on Toilet Radio: Dylan from Diary of Doom interviewed Ahab to talk about the new album, performing their record release show in a church, album concepts that never planned out, Greg Chandler of Esoteric guesting on a track, and a fan guided through their battle with cancer with the music of Ahab. Skip ahead to 38:24 to listen to the interview. BUT FIRST, the Toilet Boys have to discuss the latest from Joe Lynn Turner getting mad at the Toilet + being a weeb for Russia / Dave Ellefson a...

Welcome back to Toilet Radio. This week we talk about Brewster’s Millions-ing the lottery, checking in on the Blabbermouth beat: 80s rockstars are aging and dying, listening to the latest music from ORGY(?), the merciful end of NOFX, one of the wildest rants from an old ass metal has-been we’ve ever seen, Phil Labonte entering new echelons of unpopularity, Sabaton has an award revoked for failing to be sufficiently apolitical while beating off to tanks and shit, and an even BIGGER supergroup of ...

THIS WEEK ON TOILET RADIO: Breno is on a quest to find one (1) funny metal meme, Joe is on a quest to avoid elderly swingers. OTHER TOPICS: David DiSanto and the Vektors got kicked off the stupid metal cruise for being stupider than a metal cruise. The Taakes got CANCELLED from touring Australia! Quick, where’s their GoFundMe and NYTimes editorial??!?! An update on THE BIG SIX, the hottest new band that still doesn’t exist. Breno and Jordan discuss the world of official and unofficial Star Wars-...

Welcome to a brand new year of Toilet Radio. We celebrated New Years Eve by watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Project Runway, and Delicatessen respectively. On this episode: Breno goes on an epic gamer rant about Chat Pile and the hype overload from list season. We talk about THE BIG SIX, the latest supergroup consisting of six death core vocalists. Chuck Billie of Testament is now a house flipper. Specifically, he became a house flipper during the absolute apex of the housing market in the Uni...

It’s the final (non-Patreon) episode of the year! We’ve reflected on our year and with all the sentimentality inherent in these high holidays, decide to rip into some real freaks. First up: Venom Prison has been accused of TERF shit – we investigate. Season of Mist and their dipshit PR lady decided to weigh in and provide some truly nasty transphobia on Christmas Eve. We dig deeper into the dreaded Season of Piss. The now former guitarist for Wormwitch penned a lengthy Substack diatribe about ma...

We give each other nice xmas gifts on this week’s very special holiday episode. BUT ALSO: Joe talks about a disturbing scene in a West Texas bathroom, we laugh at a guy getting crypto scammed by a YouTube account pretending to be Lars Ulrich, Breno getting COVID for the ninth time, and TOOL finding a new way to rip off their fans with overpriced tchochkies. It is a good, and holy, one. Music featured on this show: The Riverboat Gamblers – Father Christmas This program is available on Spotify. ...

Your boys ran the numbers and determined that the 20 tracks featured on this episode were the 20 most popular metal songs of the year. I don’t want to be overly dramatic but I think this was the worst year for mainstream metal since the year before Black Sabbath formed. Tune in and hear what the normal people in your lives were listening to all year round. Then go back to listening to the unpopular music we all know and love. It’s a good one, folks. Music featured on this show: Nothing Legally...

This week your boys are going through their favorite songs of the year of our lord, 2k22. We’ll run the gamut between deathpop, blackgaze, tradgoth, gothenburgcore, saxowave, and doodilydoodily art music. In between, we have a larf at the exclusive tiers of Metallica Live Music Experiences™ you can purchase to get the most out of your heavy metal experience at a 100,000 capacity NFL stadium with either Pantera or Five Finger Death Punch as your opening options. Woof. Music featured on this week...

The boys are talking the big topics of the day: getting COVID, office holiday parties, and fucking around on the Toilet ov Hell Discord. M. Shadows of Avenged Sevenfold offers his solution for the Ticketmaster problem: let businesses take advantage of you. Also NFTs? The Hu is now recognized by the UN as a UNESCO heritage uhhh band. Is this the most prestigious achievement by a folk metal band? Opting out of metal memes and retiring our old villains to make room for newer, younger enemies in the...

I got covid so Jordo and Breno took over the show this week. TOPICS: Jordo chopped off four years of long, flowing hair so now it’s time to start regrowing hair. The Ozzfest Metaverse “concert” with “Motorhead” happened and we’re all worse off for it. Maynard from Tool joined the Joe Rogan show for four hours of pseud bullshit. Have fun with that. Megadeth and Metallica are still fighting because everyone involved is still emotionally 18 years old. Finally, we’re glad Twitter is dying so it can ...

The gravity blast was a mistake – Hans The crass conservationists assemble again, just in time to watch the planet get cremated. We have two special guests this time to help Hans and Eenzy crank up the heat: Carlos from Salvadoran crust-grinders Conflicto and TovH’s own Snooty Mcwords from eco-slammers Extinction. In this ecology-themed episode, we’re talking about their new five-way split Crimes Against Wildlife, the looming spectre of radical climate change, and most importantly how impending ...

THIS WEEK ON TOILET RADIO: Our chief Gen X correspondent Ian sits down with Johan Längquist, the original and current vocalist of Candlemass to talk about the new album, rejoining Candlemass after 31 years, the COVID years, the great heavy metal vocalists, Doctor Carl the doctor who plays keyboards, and getting into the “Candlemass mood”. BUT FIRST, Joe and Jordan talk about SICK NEW WORLD FESTIVAL. We go through the lineup and determine if the nü metal When We Were Young is worth a shit or what...

Hot damn, it’s a new episode of Toilet Radio! This week, our chief Gen X correspondent Ian sits down with Dan “Chewy” Mongrain of Voivod to talk about how, exactly, to get that Voivod guitar tone. No shit, we’re giving you a step-by-step guide to getting the exact Voivod sound on guitar. Also, Ian gets Chewy to open up about cartoons like Batman and Ultraman. BUT FIRST, you have the three regular hosts talking about August Burns Red cheaping out with some awful AI artwork for their new album and...

This week on Toilet Radio: We went out to see some shows. Jordo checked out Blitz Kid and Joe went to see The Misfits and Mercyful Fate. We’re talking horror punk, Fear, Alice Cooper (feat. the monstrous Kane Roberts), Danzig’s continued failure, the delightful Kreator, and the unbeatable King Diamond. OTHER TOPICS: Marty Friedman’s war on Cap’n Crunch, The Sword calls it quits, Metallica selling dog turds, Ozzy’s virtual (read: not real) metaverse performance, Jon Schaffer going into hiding, an...

This week we’re joined by Doktor Ross Sewage of Exhumed and Ludicra to talk about the latest record from the former and the unexpected reunion shows of the latter. BUT MOSTLY we’re here to talk about BODY MELT, a 1993 Australian horror movie that doesn’t make a ton of narrative sense but DOES get extremely gooey. Join as we try to suss out the narrative thread, discuss the consumerist criticism it’s founded upon, and talk about the director’s twisted disco post-punk band. It’s a good one. There...